Changes

beyond the mountains 

we spied a tempest 

rising from the deep unknown

and i ran to the horizon

i prayed for rain to come

rain to wash me

rain to change me

but the clouds held their lightning

the rain forgot to fall

and for a moment the darkness lingered 

more than i could bear

and as i struggled with the waiting

a single drop fell on my lips

i tasted the beauty that was coming

and i prayed again

for rain to come

i am sick of waiting 

to make these changes. 

Patience

patience
i'm slowly learning this virtue
love
you move so carefully
and i feel like i'm waiting here forever
while you uncover your beating heart
and some days it's all i can do
to just breathe
and hope for you

but you need patience with me too
because i'm changing
on the inside
i'll always be the same
love
but i'm still chipping away
this residue of rust
so just have patience in this process
and give me a little of your trust

what's meant to be
and what will be
are the same eventually

What Does It Mean?

[via]

these thoughts are elusive
they pass me by like stardust in the night
dreams that never quite form
sounds that are never fully spoken
i feel these emotions
vague and unpredictable
and i'm never aware of them.
i write these words
but they have no meaning at all.
or do they, somewhere to someone?
tell me your thoughts, darling
so i can misunderstand them.
share your secrets and i'll tell the world.
and you laugh because it's silly
but maybe it's not a joke at all, love.

maybe these empty expressions
are just to fill the void of space
and overcrowd my blank mind.

Divorce

[via]

a bill of divorcement is coming, love
i am demanding my copy
but in my mind
we were never married
because how can you be
when your lover doesn't love you?

don't tell me that i haven't given this a shot
i gave it my all
i showed up to every date
and i was always on time, love
but you were always late
and you never even glanced at me as you ate.

and now you expect me to stay,
and you'll judge me when i leave
because i've seen you do it to your exes
but how can i stay with this silence
and how can i love you
when you don't even see me?

Expected Too Much

[via]

i wanted more than you could give
i expected too much from you
like a pregnancy test gone wrong
my expectations turned to nothing
and as the dreams that i dreamed
faded into the night
forgotten again
i realized that you were never capable
of the things that i wanted.

Unlocked & Open

[via]

you're acing this quiz, babe
and it kind of scares me
because for a moment i thought
my thoughts were written on a poster
and no longer hidden from the world
but then i realized
it's just you that can read me
your eyes can see these secret thoughts
because we have a connection
and i am no longer scared
because if there's anyone who will love me
despite the cobwebs in my mind
it is you, love.

and so i leave the door unlocked and open.

Change is Coming

[via]

change is coming
there's a storm on the horizon, love
but i see beyond it
a beautiful new dawn
an age of love and glory
an age without fear or worry
and so we brace for the battle
and i cry for a moment
for the things that i will lose.

it will all be worth it in the end, love. 

Your Judgment

[via]

your judgment made me feel small
the unspoken words that hid in your eyes
and spilled over into your expression
i don't understand you, dear
and some days it feels that we speak foreign languages
you're kind to everyone
except me
and i don't understand
where this tension is coming from
but you've hurt me, love
you've hurt me in a million little ways.

and i thought we could be friends. 

You Led Me

[via]

You've led me here
bringing me from darkness into light
the world has opened up to me
with Your flawless touch
and i thank You, Lord
for letting me see the beauty
of each moment
for guiding me to Your perfect love
that casts out all fear and judgment
that colors over the prejudice
of black and white
in beautiful, breathtaking hues.

Immortal Wound

[via]

in my mind, you were still that sweet, innocent girl
i loved you, dear
more than my own soul
and my heart felt your hurts
i made your pain my own
because i cared
and i thought that if i showed you my heart
we would be closer
i thought i would take a chance
and trust you
even though you've never trusted me
(that should have been my warning)
now my heart is shattered
and even though the secrets i shared with you
were temporary and now do not exist
the scars that you've carved into my heart
will last for eternity
and i've never felt this much pain.

lost love may hurt for a moment,
but the knife of your own flesh and blood
will leave an immortal and fatal wound.