Friday, June 30, 2017



the world is a blur as i try to take this in
everything else fades out as i try to comprehend
i thought i understood you
i don't know what changed.
all i know is that it did.
and now i feel like i'm sinking
desperately trying to tread this water
but you won't give me any air
and i've wasted too many tears.
i can feel the time escaping,
but i'm too numb to stop it.
and you're making me feel like this was my fault.
i give to you, and i never take.
because you never offer anything but heartbreak.

Wednesday, June 28, 2017

For Awhile


i'm giving up these dreams.
i'm throwing away these hopes.
because i didn't realize until now
that they were all trash.
how could i be so blinded?
who gave me these rose colored glasses?
because you're never who i thought you were.
but you were good at faking it
for awhile. 

Stop Pretending


we take our bows through the applause
the play is over and it is time.
time to remove the masks.
but why is it so hard?
why would we rather hide
than show them who we are?
why would we rather pretend
than write our own scripts?
it's time to stop this madness.
it's time to be true. be real.
watch me take off my mask, love.

Tuesday, June 27, 2017



i was innocent then
i was blind and naive
my heart was pure back then
my intentions were filled with love
and i thought yours were the same
but i got too close to the flame
and now you burned me, love.
i would have given you anything
i would have given my all.
but instead i fell shattered on the floor
and clung to the pain as you sliced through my heart.

Memories in the Walls


these walls are filled with memories.
moments etched in time
and forever saved in my mind.
the silence of this hour
makes them scream even louder.
until everything is painted by nostalgia. 

this room cannot be forgotten.
even when you aren't here
it is filled with your presence.
and i can still feel your gaze
through time's stubborn haze.
and for a moment, i forget. 

this place will forever be unchanged
because in my mind,
i'm going back in time.
reliving those moments that made me cry.
and wishing i could redo it all, with a sigh.
because time changes everything, love.

the world is spinning slowly, dear.
and the conversations that replay
make the night seem like day
because your laughter is still in my ears
and your smile is all i can hear.
these memories leave no room for fear.



when the fire was out -
i didn't recognize you.
you no longer knew me.
and it made me wonder
if it was even real, love.
it made me question
our moment of reality.
are all connections destined to be fake?
must all our bridges eventually be burnt?
where did i mess it up?
let me take all the blame, love.
because i can't cause you any more pain.
i can't cause you any more pain.



the moon gave us no light
and the stars hid themselves in fear
at the brilliance of our love
at the way our hearts caught fire.
i looked at you and felt the pain in your chest.
i glanced away from the hurt swimming in your eyes;
but i could not hide from it, love.
because even when we are apart,
i am aware of your essence.
i wanted to cry, i wanted to scream.
and you did too, it was written in your voice.
etched in the tightness of your throat.
thinly veiled in the softness of your murmur.
but you didn't. and i didn't.
we just stood there in silence.
with our hearts embracing.
in an empty room.
while the world spun recklessly by us.

Monday, June 19, 2017

Be Soft


be soft
she whispered
be soft
she held my gaze
and for the first time,
i understood.
for the first time
it all made sense.
if that's the only thing you learn in life, love,
be soft;
be ever so soft.
even when you feel the pain stabbing you
and you want to grab your knife too
be soft, my love
just be soft.

Tuesday, June 13, 2017

Lightning or Rain


your words were like hail
leaving marks on my soul.
your words were unedited, unminced and obvious.
like thunder in the distance,
you thought they would not touch me
but you forgot that thunder is created by lightning,
and lightning burns all it touches, love.

and when the bolt hit me,
my soul absorbed its energy
(in an attempt to survive)
but now,
your voice is stuck inside my head
and all i can hear is
you'll never be good enough.


your words were like rain
with the sun shining through
washing my soul, bringing life to my wilting mind.
like a shower in the springtime,
you had no idea the strength they would provide.

and when the storm was over,
your kindness was what refreshed me.
and now your words are in my head
and i took the time to save them
like raindrops in a jar,
because rain is the only thing 
that can dampen the sting of lightning.  


are you the lightning or the rain
in someone else's day?