Monday, July 27, 2015


The still small voice has been haunting my thoughts. I read about the Israelites, and the law. Always, they were required to give God the first-fruits of their labor. Their very best. The first-fruits are always the best quality. God is all-powerful and deserving of all the glory and honor we feeble human beings can give.

Not to mention, He gave us His very best. His only begotten Son suffered a horrendous death so that we could be forgiven. Isn't giving God our best the very least we can do?

But are we? Am I giving God my best? My first-fruits? Or am I giving Him the left-overs? The extra that I want to discard after I've taken all that I feel I need?

What is the first thing you do in the morning?

What do you think about first? Do you whisper a prayer of thanks for another day, or do you reach for your phone and start checking facebook and email? And then maybe, just maybe, you'll mumble a prayer at the end of the day if you don't fall to sleep as soon as you get in bed.

I'm not saying that morning is the only time to have devotions or that you have to tithe 10% every paycheck. But what is your priority? Is it God? Or is it you, or your popularity, or your possessions? Would you be like that widow who gave God her last 2 pennies, trusting that He will provide? Or am I more like the Pharisee that proudly puts in a $20, but saves several hundred back for myself? Even though I already have a nice car and a warm house and this missionary wants to provide medical supplies to people who are dying from lack of resources. And yet, I justify only giving a small amount, and continuing to live in my own comfort. Never giving too much. Never letting it make me uncomfortable. Never sacrificing too much.

Because after all, Jesus was only crucified so that I could be forgiven. I mean, I wouldn't want to be too radical, would I?

Tuesday, July 21, 2015

Strength to Follow

[via pinterest]

how can You love me so much
when i seem to love You so little
i look back on my life
and i see Your hand
moving events and clearing a path
i don't deserve this love
i don't deserve this grace
it overwhelms me
this flood of feelings
these feelings of wonder
why You would notice me
a lowly girl who likes her own way
i feel myself falling
falling in love, as my Redeemer woos me
back into His loving arms
how did i leave them in the first place?
my Love,
what is Your plan for me?
i want to bring You glory
i long for it more than
i ever imagined
i know You have a plan
and i trust that You will guide me
and i pray that i will have strength to follow
and i pray that i will have strength to follow

Sunday, July 19, 2015

The World to Me

To all the people who've
Encouraged me
Prayed for me
And just cared about me
You mean the world to me
You're kinder than I'll ever deserve you to be
And it makes me feel so small and humble
And I pray that I can return the kindness
If not to you, to some other kind soul
Who needs a little uplifting

We stopped at a small gas station and got some ice cream cones
And the very southern young man in front of us
Insisted on paying for all 3 of ours
As we walked out to the car,
Another gentleman insisted on lifting my aunt's walker into the car
My first reaction may have been
I'm not an invalid!
But then I felt a little upset that the feminism movement
Has made me feel like it's an insult to be treated so kindly and with such dignity

I received a text tonight, such a small thing
From a woman who has been through so much in life
Yet she's one of the sweetest women I've ever had the chance to meet
It made me cry, those few kind words
She told me that God had big plans for me
And she promised to be praying.
It was just one of those little things that comes exactly at the moment you need it most.

And I pray that God can use me like that.

Thursday, July 16, 2015


[via Pinterest]

To all the naysayers out there,
I'm too quiet, I'm too loud,
"Why did you do such a thing?"
"That'd be a great job, but
Keep your options open..."
There's one thing you've made
Perfectly clear -
That I'll never amount to much.
"Change the way you act"
"Change the way you are"
I know what you think of me.
But there's one minor thing
That I think you forgot to consider.
I serve a God who makes
The impossible, possible.
I'm well aware of my flaws
But I don't have to overcome them alone.
He's strong in my weakness
And He'll use my life for His glory
So it doesn't matter how much
You try to break me down
Because life isn't always that simple.
In fact, it never is when you serve
An Omnipotent God.



you are like a drug, my dear
a potent, powerful drug
my throat restricts
and my blood runs quicker
from overdosing on you
my head is swirling
and it's all so confusing
but once the hangover dissipates
i know that you're no good for me
the memories only come in flashes
as if too painful to recall
or perhaps just too jumbled
you are like the worst kind
of drug, my dear
the worst kind of drug

Sunday, July 12, 2015

Into Ashes

oh God,
i need You so much
without You i can
accomplish nothing
but only manage to
mess everything up
and dig myself into
a deeper hole than
i can get out of
everything beautiful
has turned to ashes
and i'm left alone
wondering how
i could have let
it get this far
but here i am
fully surrendered
and humbled at
Your feet

Sunday, July 5, 2015

Becoming a Worthy Bride


It seems like there are endless blog posts and even books about how to find the perfect guy or the most important things to look for in a husband, but it's a little harder to find information the other way around - i.e. as in preparing yourself to be a pure bride, a good wife, etc. This topic has really been weighing on my heart recently and I've probably started typing this post up a half dozen times now. I think it is good to have standards when it comes to dating, but perhaps if we were more worried about our end of things it would turn out better in the long run. Instead of selfishly thinking what we could get out of the relationship, maybe we should think more about what we can give.

So how do you become a worthy bride? First of all, I want to say that it is most important that we prepare to be a worthy spiritual bride - after all, we are the bride of Christ. If Christ is at the center of our lives, then everything else in life will fall into place. When Christ is our first love, all our desires are satisfied. Christ, not any guy on earth, will fulfill all of our desires. Are you lonely? Do you want a guy to need you? These needs cannot be filled by man. If we are looking for a husband to satisfy these needs, we will never be happy. Our marriage will always be strained by the pressure that we put on each other, because we are looking for happiness from the wrong source. God must make you happy. There is a hole in your heart that only He can fill. If you aren't happy as a single girl, you definitely won't be happy as a married woman. God must fulfill all your needs, because He is the only One who can.

By letting God mold your being into a woman after His heart, you will become a worthy bride. If you allow Him, He will soften your heart in all the right places. If you abide in Him alone, you will bear the fruit of the spirit. He will mold you into a beautiful vessel for His service. So then, you may wonder, isn't it important to get the right guy? Well, if Christ is at the center of your life, that will fall into place as well. God will also mold your desires so that you are attracted to the type of man that will only draw you closer to God.

Marriage isn't about making us happy. Marriage wasn't intended by God to be a self-centered endeavor. Marriage was designed to help us serve God better. When a man and a woman come together to serve God, they can do great things for His kingdom. And when a marriage is founded completely on God, then it will be pure bliss - because your desires are fulfilled by God, not fallible man. When both husband and wife have their life centered on God, they only draw each other closer to God and each other. Since their needs are met by God, they are able to live selflessly and strive together towards one purpose.

This is so beautiful.

So, prepare yourself. Stop worrying about the perfect guy; center your life around God, and let Him take care of the rest. Because He will, darling. He will never fail us.

Stay lovely,

PS- I've been a little quiet lately....I'm almost done with my Master's degree and internship though so it's been getting really crazy around here and I don't have much free time. However, I promise I haven't forgotten about you all and I will probably have much more free time starting in about a month.