Saturday, May 27, 2017

Lost Vision

This isn't a poem. This isn't make believe.
This post will be real and raw and full of questions.
Consider yourself warned.

i'm thinking about taking a break from blogging. or maybe even deleting my blog. idk, i just feel like i've lost my vision. i want to share beauty. so much of life, i view in awe and wonder. i believe that life is art, and there is so much beauty around us, just waiting to be discovered. my goal in starting this blog was to help people see the world differently, but i don't really feel like i'm doing that, and so it's time to reevaluate.

some days it feels like i'm writing to the blank wall of hyperspace. other days, i share with people in real life and they either don't react or misunderstand. people have a horrible tendency to take everything at face value. i write nothing at face value. i use the endearment "love" and my friends assume i have a romantic interest. i write about love in a general, vague sense of loving everyone or loving your friend or loving the stray cat you found. and people automatically interpret love as romance. yes,  loving that stray cat can be romantic. watching the sunset alone is romantic. everything in life can be romantic when you have the right mind set. when you look at the world in color instead of black and white. it doesn't mean i'm hopelessly in love with some boy. it means i'm in love with life. hopefully, fantastically, beautifully.

and all i wish is that you, my friend, could see so much beauty too. that you could stop being so scared of every single emotion and just embrace life and live it in it's entirety.

but i'm not getting that point across somehow. it's all lost in translation. and i'm not sure why or how... so i'm ready to give it all up, to quit trying. if you have any insight, any suggestions for me to improve my style or what i'm doing wrong here, i would appreciate hearing them.

that's all.
rant over.
thanks for listening.

love and peace always.

Flawless Imperfections


i wandered alone in my travels
with stardust illuminating my nights
the beauty of a thousand horizons
and all of them out of sight
i fell in love with a stranger
and with all the world around me
our flawless imperfections
our love for all things bright
i dreamed a million dreams in a moment
and all of them came true
and, love, when i look at you
i know so much more than i knew
and these wishes are enough to scare you
but for me, they never do
because love overcomes all fear
and i wish you would experience that too, my dear.

love yourself.
and if you need to, change yourself. 
then, i promise, the rest will follow.
because life is beautiful and hard 
and love is the only thing that matters.



i realized i never loved you
i loved the person you made me become

Sunday, May 21, 2017

Me Too

i hear your words
i feel your presence 
as if you were here right now
these emotions are unsteady
and sometimes i forget 
that i need to breathe
but, love, you're always there
with soft words 
with flawless advice
and i marvel at the details
you never overlook
and i just want to tell you
i could talk to you all day
but i think my eyes already did
and i think yours whispered back 
me too. 

Sunday, May 7, 2017



these thoughts need pruning
like an overgrown forest
they have overtaken my mind
becoming so entangled and entwined
that i cannot for the life of me figure out
where the roots are coming from
and who planted these seeds -
was it me, or you, or him, or her?
seeds of doubt and love and fear and hope.
and this forest is weary
because now the sun can't shine through
and all we can do is overthink it all

Now I'll Forget


i forgot about your faults, love
and now i will forget about your strengths too
until you are just a faceless name
that i used to know. 

Saturday, May 6, 2017

Building Trust


i want to trust you, love
but if you
shatter my heart
i'm not sure if i'll ever recover.

so please, tell me the truth
even if it hurts
tell me the things you don't want me to know
if i hear them from you,
i'll know i can trust you
and i'm good at forgiveness
but not so much trusting, love.

Thursday, May 4, 2017



you hurt me without trying
my pain doesn't even make you flinch
and i have so many scars, love
but why do i find them so beautiful?



all i could hear was the softness in your voice
the hesitation in your expression
the way you tried to hide
yourself from me
but i knew why
i felt your pain in my heart
i didn't say a word
and when i was kind again
your fire reignited
and i cried that i ever made you put it out.

Tuesday, May 2, 2017

I Needed You


all along i never knew
i needed someone
to crack through these walls
someone to help me
even when i don't want it
i hate advice
but yours is always perfect, love
i am strong and independent
until you are around
and i've never minded being blind
until you helped me see
and now the world is different
and now so much is changing
and i have a million things to say
but you're gonna have to read between the lines
you're gonna have to read my mind.

Monday, May 1, 2017



he looked at her with sadness in his eyes
and she whispered in the silence
i need to figure myself out
before i spend time 
trying to figure someone else out. 
then she turned and walked away
while silent tears made rivers
on her pale cheeks in the moonlight.

Hardest Thing


it's the hardest thing in the world, love
to act like everything is normal
when your heart is bleeding out.