Saturday, October 29, 2016



headlights fading
sun light is breaking
and the world is just you and i
we drive until our eyes close
and we are drunk on laughter
high on emotions of wonder and excitement

it's just us and the wilderness
the beauty of the wild
and the soft spoken sun
hiding behind some clouds
we dance in the untamed grass
and we sing in the rain
we fall in love with the dirt
falling into earth's cool embrace

always wandering
never lost
we don't know where we are
but it only matters who we're with

it's just us and the city
a new frontier of humans
that we've never met before
lives that pass us by 
without a second thought 
a million story lines being written at once
and once in awhile they intersect
once in awhile they become entwined

we wander on in this life of exploration
trying to find our way
or just enjoying the ride

and those who are lucky
discover the secret
those who never give up

we live and we love
we give and take
and at the end of the day
the world just keeps on spinning
and it is beautiful, love
it is all so very beautiful

Wild Flowers


we sit in silence
as the flowers surround us
so wild and free
and unashamed of their beauty

words are lost
as we ponder their meanings
feeling deep thoughts
that are beyond language

the stars come out
and we are so surprised
at the elusive passing of time

how can days turn into years
and years into moments?

and yet we see the secrets
of the world
and love they are dark and deep
and there are so so many.



the world is subdued;
     it's reflective and downcast.
the colors of her personality
     forgotten in tones of gray.
her shapely elegance
     shrouded in a concealing mist.
we wonder at this loss,
     and cry for the beauty of the past.
when reality becomes cruel and harsh,
     and we cut out our hearts to protect them,
i promise i won't forget you,
     even then, my dear.

Monday, October 24, 2016

That Look

i fall for you, i realized,
when i look in your eyes.
what is that glimpse i always catch?
all i know is it's pure and it's ardent,
     it's soft and gentle,
oh love, it is so much softer,
and so much warmer,
than the most exquisite blanket
that has ever been wrapped around me.
it lumps in my throat and chases my heart.
and i've never felt so excited to get lost
as i do when i look in your eyes.
and it's not just your eyes -
although they are lovely, dark, and deep -
it's that look,
where i almost feel your gentle touch,
it stirs a longing in my soul.
there is no language to describe it.
it isn't something that a mind can even imagine,
until it has been experienced.
and oh, i feel sorry
for those who must live life
without experiencing that look.
for there's nothing on earth, love,
i promise there is absolutely nothing
that can compare to that look in your eyes.

Shattered Beauty


it was her shatteredness that made her beautiful.
when light refracts off a thousand different pieces,
it illuminates even the darkest corners. 



i have so much regret, love,
i think of you with pain.
you may think i've forgotten
how we never said goodbye.
you may think i didn't know
how much i broke your heart.
and if we ever meet again,
will you please ask me why?
ask me why i ran,
and i'll tell you through the tears,
that it wasn't because i wanted to hurt you.
it wasn't even because i didn't like you.
truth is, i had never loved anyone
as much as i loved you.
and it scared me.
it absolutely terrified me.
and so i pushed you away,
i pretended i didn't care,
i acted like i didn't know it was you.
and so, like the gentleman you are,
you let me go.
and you'll never know how much
i've cried.
how much i've begged God
to take back those moments.
how much i wish i could run to you
and say i'm sorry and beg for forgiveness.
and if we meet again, please don't be a gentleman.
please make me stay, and ask me hard questions.
tell me that i don't need to be afraid.
please take me in your arms and teach me how to forgive myself.

Sunday, October 23, 2016

Golden Carpet

fall rolls out her golden carpet,
as the trees change into their evening gowns.
the wind rustles with cool excitement,
greeting the day with a brisk and cheery air.
the sun beams down one lingering ray of warmth,
     a dignified good-bye until spring's dawn.

warm hues envelop our little sphere,
romancing the world before winter's hostile entrance.
crisp autumn air makes a fierce fusion with cozy campfires,
like a couple that doesn't quite get along,
     but their passion makes up for it.

if spring brings love in the air,
autumn brings romance and snuggles and long conversations.
autumn brings slow walks, enjoying the moment, and gratitude.
the world is alive for a moment more before her slumber,
and all i want to do is dance in the leaves,
breathe in the sunshine, and drink in the splendor.

will you hold my hand a little tighter, love?
let's pause time and forget our deadlines.
we'll run far away and discover things we've never seen before.
we'll explore until we get lost and can't find our way back.
we'll laugh at the beauty and wonder at autumn's aesthetic allure.
this world is too sentimental and stunning to miss.

Saturday, October 22, 2016

My Minuscule Everything


i step out into the cool night air,
glancing up at the stars,
     to look for a reality check. 
the world is unaware of me,
spinning recklessly on her track.
time will not slow for my misery.
what really, truly can i control?
     not much.
and yet, how can i become
     so puffed up, so haughty?
i am a speck of dust,
so intricately put together
that even the microscopic parts of me
work together in perfect unison.
am i responsible for the function of my cells?
did i allot my talents, or give myself understanding?
can i be thanked for words that i type
or thoughts that i think?
yes, i have a choice to use these talents,
     but they are not mine. 
i did not create them or give them to myself.
my life is nothing more than a breath,
a blink in time and it will be over.
in comparison to eternity,
in comparison to even the universe,
i am nothing.
and yet, God is bigger still than all of these.
and He loves me, and He has whispered His promises
     to me. 
i cannot fathom this, but how can i not
give Him my minuscule everything in return?

Hearts with Gravity


you and i.
we have something special, love.
it's more than just electricity.
we have gravity, love.
like the moon and the tide,
are you and i.
this silent push and pull,
this complicated dance that we dance.
it floods my mind, as i try to forget it.
waves of emotion, love and confusion.
we have a connection, without knowledge.
like fleeting, faded, fallen stars,
our lives flash and collide without memory.
i understand you and yet i don't.
you chase me and let me go.
and i can't decide, for the life of me,
     which i like better.

Wednesday, October 19, 2016

The World in Her Heart

She fell in love with everyone.
Collecting little pieces of beauty
And saving them in her heart.
And as she traveled, she left
A trail of love and bits of herself,
Until the entire world lived in her soul.

Sunday, October 16, 2016

Broken Trust

why must life be so harsh
and love be so cruel?
it bends and breaks
even the best of us.
when hopes go unanswered
and dreams cannot be let go.
love is good, my dear,
it's obsession that steals the joy.
clinging to something so tightly
that it suppresses your life.
when he broke your trust, girl,
why didn't you stop trusting him?
he doesn't deserve your waiting on him,
he'll never live up to your patience.
but with every moment of wasted love,
i watch my friend die on the inside
of a broken, shattered heart.
and i wish i could tell you to
just let him go.
forget and move on.
if only it were that easy.

how do you help someone overcome a broken heart and move on? 

Wednesday, October 12, 2016

Are You an Artist?

are you an artist? he asked

what is an artist?
would i fit the definition?
is it someone who can draw or one who paints beautiful paintings?
i can draw, and i love to paint, but beauty is in the eye of the beholder.
the grip of a pencil and the stroke of a brush can feel like an extension of my being.
when you become one with the paper and the ink,
when paint is your medium to express emotions.
but does this make me an artist?
i craft words into pictures, i try to convey beauty in their meaning.
but does this make me an artist of words?
i look at the night sky and marvel at its beauty.
i see it all around - the brilliant details of a freshly fallen leaf.
the way the wind embraces you, or fights against you.
the wrinkles that appear when an old lady smiles at a young child.
i feel it in the warmth of the summer sun smiling down.
in the immaculate softness of a new kitten.
in the cool harshness of the piano keys against my fingers.
i hear it in the ebb and flow of conversations and people around me.
and in nearly silent stillness of the night.
and in the melody of notes that somehow work together to make everything more beautiful.
the first requirement of an artist, is that they find beauty.
life is beauty. and the gift of an artist is to see that beauty. everywhere.
but an artist must also be able to take that beauty and show it to others.
their work makes people stop and think
     "wow, i've never noticed how beautiful that is before!" 
what is an artist? really, truly?
it's not an answer i can give,
i do not know if i am an artist,
but i would love to be one.

Tuesday, October 11, 2016

Connection, Beauty, and Love

the last flowers of summer are fading, love,
and fall has awakened with a beautiful blush.
we meander down the street
     as the wind and leaves race past us
     // painting the background with a rustling symphony.
you glance over at me with love in your eyes,
    those deep, dancing eyes.
and your gentle, playful laugh warms the air.
we talk about everything, we talk about nothing.
we whisper our hopes and our dreams.
we shout our fears in the wind.
as twilight paints over the brilliant colors of autumn,
the moon smiles down on us,
     silently listening to the ebb of our conversation
     // wandering like the hidden mountain stream.
the world is in love with our beauty,
the world is in love with our connection.
without it, she fades into gray.
     her luminous hues exist no more.
without our love, the world is ugly, harsh, and unrealistic.
and so you smile as you take my hand,
and pull me on when i want to quit,
for connection, for beauty, for love.

Thursday, October 6, 2016

Deep Waters


who can understand himself?
show me the man and i'll show you a legend.
we are deep creatures with heavy mysteries.
what is an emotion that we can experience it?
who has written a language to converse about them?
and who can interpret their meanings?

deep waters appear to be still.
but currents flow beneath its surface.
it is the same with people.
some personalities feel more deeply.
when you look at them, they look like a still sea.
calm and beautiful in their disguise.
but once you jump in, you'll begin to realize
just how many struggles they go through
    // beneath the surface.

shallow waters appear to be tumultuous,
but i have found -
these people often don't understand their feelings.
they live life without truly feeling it.
and sometimes they have to jump into the deep waters
     // to understand themselves.

and so, although i've always longed to be understood,
i am beginning to realize
God has given me this gift.
the gift of feeling, so intensely.
so intensely that i can help others feel.
i not only understand my own emotions,
but the emotions of others.
and while, at first glance, it seems like a curse,
it is actually one of life's greatest blessings -
to be able to help someone else feel, see,
    // and maybe even understand, just a little.

Victory Comes Not Without a Struggle


darkness surrounds you
as you lie awake
thunder rumbles
hours pass as sleep eludes you.
but the darkness and thunder
that keep you awake aren't from without
but rage on in your soul.
a struggle that no one wants to feel.
we run from conflict and hide from hurt
but the deepest kinds of conflict and hurt
cannot be avoided when they come from within.
i've been spending too many sleepless nights.
plagued by self-doubt and turmoil.
but i've found a secret through the wrestling.
a silver lining in the storm cloud.
there's a beauty that's only found in the broken.
there's a peace that can only be experienced in victory.
often we have a romanticized view of the struggles of life.
we want to celebrate the victory
without the bloody fight before.
we want to be a skillful sailor
by only sailing on smooth seas.
but life isn't like that.
life is messy and unromantic.
life is hard and dirty.
we have to learn to embrace the struggle to overcome it.
the sunset is always more beautiful after the storm.

Wednesday, October 5, 2016

Love or a Game

you had me in chains
with your sweet smile
and smooth words
always trying to guess
if it was love or a game
teases of time
that were never enough to tell
i was enthralled by your beauty
i was captivated by your perfection
until i realized you were only playing
you sensed my affection
and played it for your benefit
and that, my love,
makes you ugly to me.
and now i'm free,
free from your torment
living life with a smile
that comes from a peace deep within.
you may still be hot,
but deserving of my love -
you are most certainly not.

Romantic Conclusions


it's when that cute boy grins at you,
or is it when he takes your hand?
when he buys you a bouquet of wildflowers,
or when he stays up late on the phone to you?
it's something we dream about,
we long for and hope for.
that someday we'll find it,
but will we know it when we see it?
i've never experienced earthly romance,
so maybe i'm not the most qualified to talk about it.
but i have experienced a heavenly romance -
and so i think that i am.
there's a lot i don't know about romance,
but here is what i do know.
romance isn't cheap.
no, it doesn't always cost literal money,
but it does cost.
it costs time, it costs vulnerability,
it costs giving yourself when you may get nothing in return.
it costs love, of the deepest sort.
romance, isn't something that anyone can do.
it takes a man.
a strong and brave warrior.
a man who can protect,
and yet cherish at the same time.
a noble and true man
who will uphold right and fight against wrong.
it takes a lady.
a gentle and kind woman.
a lady who can soften the situation with her smile
and firm but calm words.
a pure and generous woman
who is strong enough to forgive and show grace.
romance is when a true man pursues a lady,
romance is when they promise their lives to each other.
romance is when they fight, and he still holds her hand.
romance is when they both make sacrifices,
because they are more concerned about the other's happiness than their own.
romance is when you love someone so much, you would die for them.
this romance is uncommon
this romance is hard fought for and not easily won.
this romance brings pain, trials, and hardships.
but it also brings joy, and love, and peace.
it is something that is unmistakable.
and when the world sees it, they will marvel.
they will stop in their tracks and wonder at its beauty.
how do i have hope for such an impossible standard?
because i serve the God of romance.
He has already written the perfect romance,
and i know that He is fully capable of writing an earthly one for me.
romance isn't cheap, love,
so let's not waste our time with fake romances and broken hearts.
let's run after the God of romance,
and He will write our happily ever afters.

what is romance? 
it's something i've been struggling with lately...
i am a romantic. 
i've always heard the term hopeless romantic,
but lately i heard a new term that i really like - 
hopeful romantic (thanks Hannah at Grace in Everything)
so, this post is inspired by that - 
and is about why i'm a hopeful romantic. ;)

Sunday, October 2, 2016

Beautiful Lives

we live beautiful lives, my love.
we breathe in the sunshine
and dance in the starlight.
the world spins around us
     at a dizzying speed,
but you grab my hand and whisper
     we are all we need.
as time slows and earth passes us by,
let's laugh in the twilight
and hold hands in the moonlight.
our words string on into the night
    like a peaceful mountain stream
    // unhurried and calm.
this is the substance that dreams are made of.
when we would rather be awake than sleep.
the world is unaware of what we share
rushing on its tedious track.
promise me one thing, love,
before you leave.
promise me just this one thing.
tell me you'll hang on tight and never let go.
promise me we'll live in the moment
and savor its beauty. 

Battle Weary

i've been feeling a little battle weary lately.
a little tired of the fight.
why must life be so hard and tenuous?
why is there always another mountain to climb?
i long for rest, and dream of giving up.
the ebb and tide of feelings threatens my grip.
hanging over the edge and the only thing that keeps me
is Your unfailing love. Your goodness, grace and mercy.
although man may fail me, You never will.
You're always there, and you catch me when i fall.