When We were Innocent

[via]

i found a photograph the other day
of when we were younger
you were smiling with innocence in your eyes
i remember that look, dear
i remember it like it was yesterday
i remember the feeling
that care-free feeling without a worry in the world
we were young, and we didn't care what tomorrow would bring.

the memories threatened to choke me, dear
because i know what you've been through
i know the place that you are now
and i wish we could have those days back.
and i'm sure if i could talk to you,
you would too. 

We're Friends Now

[via]

i'm not sure when it happened
there was never a definite click
it just kind of happened - long and drawn out
gradually, until one day i realized...
i realized that i no longer get annoyed
we don't argue so much
and the silences aren't quite so hostile
i call you a friend now
when once i would have laughed
our time together is interspersed with
     deep thoughts, shared sentiments, and laughter.
we look at the world through different lenses
but sometimes i get tired of my view
and so it's nice to see it through your side, girl.

funny things happen when you're forced to spend time with people.
and, let me tell you, it's the best thing in the world
to feel a connection with someone when there used to be tension.

Only Aware of You

[via]

the chatter of conversations fades into the background
dozens of people in the room, but i'm only aware of you
and i pray to God that you won't notice
     my racing heart, quick breath, or shaking hands
i can feel your gaze even though i'm not looking
i sense the kindness in your soul
and as you start talking, like it's the easiest thing in the world, love,
i scream at my mind to stop spinning.
and pray that you can forgive my short answers.
because in that moment, all i can see
is the splash of color that you're wearing
all i can feel is the accidental brush of your hand
and your eyes overflowing with kindness.
this is a tennis match and you're giving me easy passes
asking me simple questions that i should be able to answer
but i can't even return them
and so you just grab another ball.
you set me up perfectly, a chance i can't resist
and even though my humor falls short,
you give me the music that i long for
that care-free - that breath-taking laugh
and i smile at the beauty of the moment
but when i go home i cry at my mistakes.

Lost

[via]

we're lost in our heads
these thoughts are beautiful
and for a moment time slows down
and for a moment planet earth is gone
this is just a moment it won't last forever
before it vaporizes, let's save it in our hearts
dance to these emotions and breathe in this stardust

dance to these emotions and breathe in this stardust

we're out of our heads

all thought has escaped us

and we forget about all our cares

and we forget about planet earth

this is just a moment it won't last forever

before it vaporizes, let's save it in our hearts

dance to these emotions and breathe in this stardust

dance to these emotions and breathe in this stardust

we're adrift in time and space

the thought of you will always remain

and we love the way it makes us feel, this pain

and we love the way it shrinks planet earth

this is just a moment it won't last forever

before it vaporizes, let's save it in our hearts

dance to these emotions and breathe in this stardust

dance to these emotions and breathe in this stardust

Overcast

[via]

there are tears trapped inside my soul
like an overcast day without rain
it feels heavy and full of expectation
but what good is rain
when there are no flowers to water?
and what good are tears
when no friend will comfort?
and so the clouds remain with the pain
holding out for another day
a better place and a better time

and i beg God to let me cry.

Distant

[via]

distant and cold
like the approaching blizzard
you ignore my requests
you ignore my outstretched hand
you ignore my feelings
i'm trying to be a good friend
and you make me feel like i'm failing
i don't understand your mind, dear
i wish i could speak your language
i would give anything to be a good friend
but i know i'm not
so this is me backing away
until you are ready to talk it through.

Conversations

[via]

let's just take this slow, love
i'm not good with words
i've never danced before
and this conversation
(can i call it that?)
feels like i keep stepping on your feet
and moving to the wrong beat

you're more graceful than i
so you try to cover it up for me
you somehow manage to catch the ball
that i tossed in such a hideous pass

don't give up on me,
i promise one day we will click
one day we'll start dancing
and we'll feel the rhythm in our souls

--
to all the people who talk to me, even on days when i just can't do words: you're amazing, fantastic, lovely, and generous. i couldn't do this thing called life without all you amazing people. thank you for being patient with me and for overlooking my conversation inadequacies ;) i've long held this idea that there is an inverse relationship between your ability to talk and your ability to write. i'm not sure if that's a good excuse or not, so you can take it or leave it. lol

to the extroverts of the world (and especially one who i call my best friend): i absolutely adore you. you make life easier, i could listen to you all day (literally). i especially need to shout out to my bestie who has put up with so much more than anyone ever should lol. she's sat through the longest silences and never once been awkward on the other side. she's also put up with my late night extrovertism when i have to remind myself to let her speak. (it's true, i'm serious) and she still loves me, just the same.

to the introverts of the world: i love you too. you "get" my quiet. you don't judge me for my lack of expression. you don't have unrealistic expectations of how much should be said. it may be harder for us to become friends (but i don't even think that because i've had more introvert friends than extrovert), but once we become friends, the connection is so deep, so real. 

Music Obsession

oh
my
goodness

i cannot take this, i'm literally obsessed

this is perfection, guys.
LOVE the lyrics of this one!

Barb

death is cruel and relentless
the last time i saw you was awhile ago
but i didn't know it would be the last
i knew you were sick
cancer they said
and you looked tired and weak
but still full of so much love and kindness
you were a role model to everyone that met you
and i'm not sure if you even knew it
because you were always so humble and giving
always so generous, with your time, energy, and love
and that sweet, sweet voice - i'll never forget it
i heard that you left us today
and i cried
i cried for selfish reasons
i cried remembering all the good memories
i cried thinking of your family
i cried because home won't be the same
but then i thought of you,
and how you have no more pain
how you are in the glory of Jesus now
and how lovely your voice must sound
      worshiping your Creator, like it was made to do
and it gave me peace through the tears
your race is done, you've won your crown
and i can't imagine the lovely smile that is gracing your face
heaven is looking brighter every day.

we will miss you, Barb.
but you are on to so much better things. 

Good

[via]

life is so good
it is so beautiful, love
even though there are dark moments
even if we sometimes cry
God is good, and God is love
He is gracious and kind and ever so patient
we run from Him and yet He pursues us
He protects us and guides us
He is truly the only one that will ever understand us
He sees the secrets of my heart
     all the secrets of my heart, love
and He still loves me
and even the deepest parts of me,
that i may never understand, He does
it gets me every time
how can i resist Him?
how can i deny such breathtaking love?