For Awhile

[via]

i'm giving up these dreams.
i'm throwing away these hopes.
because i didn't realize until now
that they were all trash.
how could i be so blinded?
who gave me these rose colored glasses?
because you're never who i thought you were.
but you were good at faking it
for awhile. 

Stop Pretending

[via]

we take our bows through the applause
the play is over and it is time.
time to remove the masks.
but why is it so hard?
why would we rather hide
than show them who we are?
why would we rather pretend
than write our own scripts?
it's time to stop this madness.
it's time to be true. be real.
watch me take off my mask, love.

Innocent

[via]

i was innocent then
i was blind and naive
my heart was pure back then
my intentions were filled with love
and i thought yours were the same
but i got too close to the flame
and now you burned me, love.
i would have given you anything
i would have given my all.
but instead i fell shattered on the floor
and clung to the pain as you sliced through my heart.

Memories in the Walls

[via]

these walls are filled with memories.
moments etched in time
and forever saved in my mind.
the silence of this hour
makes them scream even louder.
until everything is painted by nostalgia. 

this room cannot be forgotten.
even when you aren't here
it is filled with your presence.
and i can still feel your gaze
through time's stubborn haze.
and for a moment, i forget. 

this place will forever be unchanged
because in my mind,
i'm going back in time.
reliving those moments that made me cry.
and wishing i could redo it all, with a sigh.
because time changes everything, love.

the world is spinning slowly, dear.
and the conversations that replay
make the night seem like day
because your laughter is still in my ears
and your smile is all i can hear.
these memories leave no room for fear.

Burnt

[via]

when the fire was out -
i didn't recognize you.
you no longer knew me.
and it made me wonder
if it was even real, love.
it made me question
our moment of reality.
are all connections destined to be fake?
must all our bridges eventually be burnt?
where did i mess it up?
let me take all the blame, love.
because i can't cause you any more pain.
i can't cause you any more pain.

Hurt

[via]

the moon gave us no light
and the stars hid themselves in fear
at the brilliance of our love
at the way our hearts caught fire.
i looked at you and felt the pain in your chest.
i glanced away from the hurt swimming in your eyes;
but i could not hide from it, love.
because even when we are apart,
i am aware of your essence.
i wanted to cry, i wanted to scream.
and you did too, it was written in your voice.
etched in the tightness of your throat.
thinly veiled in the softness of your murmur.
but you didn't. and i didn't.
we just stood there in silence.
with our hearts embracing.
in an empty room.
while the world spun recklessly by us.

Be Soft

[via]

be soft
she whispered
be soft
she held my gaze
and for the first time,
i understood.
for the first time
it all made sense.
if that's the only thing you learn in life, love,
be soft;
be ever so soft.
even when you feel the pain stabbing you
and you want to grab your knife too
be soft, my love
just be soft.

Lightning or Rain

[via]

your words were like hail
leaving marks on my soul.
your words were unedited, unminced and obvious.
like thunder in the distance,
you thought they would not touch me
but you forgot that thunder is created by lightning,
and lightning burns all it touches, love.

and when the bolt hit me,
my soul absorbed its energy
(in an attempt to survive)
but now,
your voice is stuck inside my head
and all i can hear is
you'll never be good enough.

\\

your words were like rain
with the sun shining through
washing my soul, bringing life to my wilting mind.
like a shower in the springtime,
you had no idea the strength they would provide.

and when the storm was over,
your kindness was what refreshed me.
and now your words are in my head
and i took the time to save them
like raindrops in a jar,
because rain is the only thing 
that can dampen the sting of lightning.  

//

are you the lightning or the rain
in someone else's day?

Lost Vision

Ok.
This isn't a poem. This isn't make believe.
This post will be real and raw and full of questions.
Consider yourself warned.

i'm thinking about taking a break from blogging. or maybe even deleting my blog. idk, i just feel like i've lost my vision. i want to share beauty. so much of life, i view in awe and wonder. i believe that life is art, and there is so much beauty around us, just waiting to be discovered. my goal in starting this blog was to help people see the world differently, but i don't really feel like i'm doing that, and so it's time to reevaluate.

some days it feels like i'm writing to the blank wall of hyperspace. other days, i share with people in real life and they either don't react or misunderstand. people have a horrible tendency to take everything at face value. i write nothing at face value. i use the endearment "love" and my friends assume i have a romantic interest. i write about love in a general, vague sense of loving everyone or loving your friend or loving the stray cat you found. and people automatically interpret love as romance. yes,  loving that stray cat can be romantic. watching the sunset alone is romantic. everything in life can be romantic when you have the right mind set. when you look at the world in color instead of black and white. it doesn't mean i'm hopelessly in love with some boy. it means i'm in love with life. hopefully, fantastically, beautifully.

and all i wish is that you, my friend, could see so much beauty too. that you could stop being so scared of every single emotion and just embrace life and live it in it's entirety.

but i'm not getting that point across somehow. it's all lost in translation. and i'm not sure why or how... so i'm ready to give it all up, to quit trying. if you have any insight, any suggestions for me to improve my style or what i'm doing wrong here, i would appreciate hearing them.

that's all.
rant over.
thanks for listening.

love and peace always.

Flawless Imperfections

[via]

i wandered alone in my travels
with stardust illuminating my nights
the beauty of a thousand horizons
and all of them out of sight
i fell in love with a stranger
and with all the world around me
our flawless imperfections
our love for all things bright
i dreamed a million dreams in a moment
and all of them came true
and, love, when i look at you
i know so much more than i knew
and these wishes are enough to scare you
but for me, they never do
because love overcomes all fear
and i wish you would experience that too, my dear.

--
love yourself.
and if you need to, change yourself. 
then, i promise, the rest will follow.
because life is beautiful and hard 
and love is the only thing that matters.